Had you told me at the end of Hellgate 2018, upon completion of the Beast Series, that I would want (crave?) a return back to this race, I would have laughed way too hard. Well, here we are in 2023 and I've lined up 6 times for the iconic Hellgate 100K++. It's almost as if I don't know how NOT to go back to it, as it's the meeting place of what I consider my first real "ultra family." The forest surrounding the area is my first "ultra home," and I've always felt welcomed with open arms.
I've had mostly great days at Hellgate, and this year was no exception. In fact, you could say it was almost perfect. My DNF in 2019 set me back a year in my wanting to complete the race 5 times.
For the most part, the weather has been pretty amazing each year, with 2019 being the exception. We won't go there. It was really bad! This year, however, had to have good weather. I mean, I was going for #5! This was eagle trophy year! In addition to that, I wanted it to be my best Hellgate yet. I secretly wanted to beat my 2018 time, but that would take some dedicated training and a very positive attitude. One of the hard things about trying to accomplish this five years after a time of 13:21 is that I'm a bit older now, and it's tough to not get sucked into the narrative that athletically, "everything gets harder with aging." Ugh. Trying to push that aside for the better part of 2023 has been a struggle. The topic seems to surround me, and then there's always the reminder that most of the field I'm competing against is younger than I am. Thankfully my coach, Nicole, provided me with encouragement and perspective throughout my race season. I've grown in wisdom in this sport, and I try to be super coachable at all times. I trusted the plan she put forth during this most funky time of the year for training. In the end, it all came together in a way that I had fully hoped, but did not fully expect.
The pre-race meeting was, as always, pretty entertaining. David Horton is one-of-a-kind.
He's one of my favorite people on earth, in fact, except that a few days earlier I found out that he seeded me #1. I had been seeded second and third a couple of times, but never that. It begged the question: Does he believe I can do something that perhaps I should believe as well? He also seeded the eventual mens winner, Brian Culmo, #1. He called us out at pre-race and told us both that we wanted the win the next day. He told me, "This IS important!" A while back, my coach had mentioned to me that perhaps a mantra for Hellgate needed to be, "This matters." I needed a different mindset for this time of year when I'm thick in the holidays and super busy, and all I eventually feel like doing is just winging it in this race. But no, this time, it mattered.
As usual, I was nervous about how my body would react to the 12:01am start. I think there's a collective nervousness at the start of this race that we all try to quench with some good pre-race small talk and camaraderie. I love it. I truly feel like everyone wishes the best for everyone. As we began running up the trail, several of us immediately began chatting and pulling one another through the first section to the first aid station. My friend Alex Ball (training partner, and my pacer for two of my 100's) was in our group and it was great sharing some miles with him, Rick, Elton, and others. One goal I had was to keep moving through aid stations all day, and not getting caught up, even one bit, in whatever was going on at any of them. I knew there were ladies up ahead of me, and I figured I would stay conservative and let things be for a while. Also, for once, I decided to see who would stick with me instead of the other way around. I needed to run my own race from the very start.
At AS 2, Petites Gap, I simply topped off my water bottle and rolled on through. By AS 3, Camping Gap, I realized I wasn't hydrating as much as I probably should so I finished my Hylē hydration mix and filled that bottle with Tailwind, and topped off my water as well since the next section to Headforemost is long. When I got there, I was surprised it wasn't as chilly as I thought it would be. We were mostly all shedding layers and unzipping jackets. The next section to Jennings contains some tricky single track, and is where I can never believe I'm almost 50K into the race. While my splits to the previous aid stations were faster than previous years, I seemed to have taken my sweet old time to Jennings. There was a lot of cheering, and a lot of people hanging out with their crews. I grabbed a bit of banana and PB&J quarters, and got out quickly. I still had no idea where the other ladies were, or how far ahead. I figured Meg, Jana, and at least one other were somewhere up ahead, but decided to not stress myself out and just keep moving.
I began running with Corey Gray (a fellow 5-year trophy seeker) along the climb past Jennings. We pulled each other along pretty well, settling into a run/walk/but mostly run rhythm. I began experiencing a bit of a low, which is so typical of me in the hour or so before daylight. As I was running, I did a quick head-to-toe self-assessment and realized there was nothing wrong up to this point. If anything, I simply wasn't trusting myself. I was super fit and my legs felt amazing! I knew to expect that the low would come, and even though I had fueled very well up to that point, I went ahead and took another gel. It worked pretty quickly, which told me that perhaps my effort required more fueling from that point on. Things got even more interesting when somewhere around mile 33, we made too sharp of a left turn and began heading up a mountain. We both were enough in our right minds to realize that no streamers = turn around and go find the last one and figure it out from there. Sure enough, we were supposed to go straight across the road and get on the trail. We only lost a couple minutes or so, thankfully! I took a RunGum for a little caffeine boost a few minutes later. Hopefully it would help me focus a little better on the rest of the long section leading to Little Cove.
The sunrise was so pretty, and I kept thinking about how thankful I was that the weather had been so great. It was pretty cool out, and there had been no rain. Yay! I didn't know my attitude would change along with the daylight (and the caffeine), and it took me by surprise. I put on some music and started humming/singing with whatever came on my playlist. The race really felt like it was starting! Visions of that Hellgate championship trophy whirled in my head for miles. Too soon? I had no idea where anyone was, or if I was in any position to compete, but hey, at least I was optimistic and happy.
In my joyful delirium, I got to Little Cove ready to roll on through and head onto the next long section. However, I saw Meg, and it turned out that she wasn't doing too well, and said something about coughing. I didn't know the extent of the problems she was having and assumed we could just tag along with each other through the next section. We could pull into Bearwallow together later and listen to Horton yell, "This is a race!" at us. We would laugh. It would be funny. I grabbed a couple links of sausage and began to go down the trail. I asked about Jana, and if she had seen her. I still thought there might be another female ahead, but wasn't sure. Anyway, as I was running down the trail and chatting for a couple of minutes, I turned around and realized Meg wasn't there and dropped my second sausage link. Ugh. I totally thought she was behind me. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little sad. There's always some sadness at Hellgate, and there it was. I would turn my head every few minutes and check to see if she, or any other ladies, were barrelling down the trail. Boy was this section going to be long and lonely.
Let's just face it, though. The running is so much fun on the first few miles of the section to Bearwallow Gap. You can just open up and cruise along. When I realized I was probably alone for good, I put my music back on and just sang as I prepped myself for the somewhat nasty section of trail coming up. The leaves were especially high this year. This was a good time to just focus on the trail and repeat to myself to simply "run the mile I'm in."
Sometime around 8:50 am, I ran into Bearwallow with Horton yelling that I was first female, and with my hands full of stuff to unload into my drop bag. I stashed lights, trash, and my Houdini (why Shannon, why?!?). He took my water bottle to get filled, I grabbed all my nutrition, and before I knew it, he was yelling at me as I ran up the trail out of there with my bananas.
Him: How old are you!?!
Me: 45!!!
Him: Long climb ahead!
I'm pretty sure there were some other encouraging words thrown in there, I just can't remember.
As I was headed to the next aid station, Bobblet's Gap, I began to feel a few raindrops. Earlier on, I could see that clouds were forming, but since rain wasn't originally in the forecast, I thought nothing of it. It never warmed up much like it was supposed to, either. I was so worried about the sky dumping on me that I started to get mad at myself for putting the Houdini in my drop bag. I wasn't supposed to need it! Soon enough, the rain began to get a little louder and I had to pull out the emergency poncho. There I was, running in the woods with a large sheet of plastic over me because I had trust issues after the 2019 rain/ice/DNF debacle. Was it uncomfortable? Yes. Did it get me to Bobblets? Also yes. The only thing that had changed was the weather, and everything else was fine. Thank you, Lord.
My poncho and I made it to Bobblets, and by this point, I was thinking I might win the the thing. Still, there were miles to go. Day Creek was next, and it had rained on me a bit hard a couple of times. Thankfully, not for long. It was during the stretch to Day Creek that I also began to think about what I'd need to run to get to the finish in about 13 hours. Earlier on, I had been thinking around 13:15. When I got there, grabbed a pierogi, and headed out, I thought I might be able to beat the female time from last year. I couldn't believe it.
For the first time ever, I felt amazing going up the climb out of Day Creek. My pierogi and I had issues under Poncho, unfortunately, and globs of potato ended up all over. Still, I was able to run intermittently until I reached the last quarter mile of the long climb where I said screw it, I'm walking. When I reached the Blue Ridge Parkway, I said goodbye and thank you to Poncho, stashed him, and jetted (or at least that's what it felt like I did) off in the cold drizzle to the finish. When I arrived at Camp Bethel, I didn't feel the need to run up the chute. I savored this finish, and hearing Horton yell/heckle at me one more time was icing on the cake.
Thank you so much to the volunteers. Each aid station at Hellgate is a well-oiled machine, and the food, if you manage to not drop any of it, tastes so good.
Even though "hubby," as Horton calls him, wasn't there, his voice certainly was. "You have the rest of the year to recover!" went through my head as I reached Day Creek.
Coach Nicole, keep doing what you do. Pretty please and thank you. It's worked very well.
Running friends in Greenville/Simpsonville, you all are the best and you make running fun.
David Horton, thank you for believing in me. I wanted to honor that bib number and your special race. I'll return, I promise.
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